WASHINGTONâPresident Obama announced his accomplishment of all 116,365 games on Sporcle one week after the 60-seat Republican sweep of the House. With Republican legislators sure to halt any legislation supported by the Democrats, Obama now has free time to kick back in the Oval Office.
âAfter Tuesday night, I got to thinking about all of those college-aged young people who came out in droves for me in 2008 and considered going to polls this election but decided to watch The Hangover and Facebook-stalkÂ Kanye WestÂ instead,â Obama said in an interview with The Flipside. âMy hair has turned gray in the last 2 years. No oneâs wearing shirts with my photoshopped red, white and blue head anymore. I needed toÂ get myÂ youthful, hipÂ edge back. Thatâs when I found Sporcle.â
âI thought there was a national security emergency when I received a frantic call from the President at 3am on Thursday,âÂ Hillary Clinton, U.S. Secretary of State, told the Flipside. âIt turned out that Barack couldnât remember the name of Buttercup, one of the Powerpuff Girls,Â with only 35 seconds left on the âFemale Cartoon Network Characters’ quiz.â
The Presidentâs new hobby has resulted in some shakeups on the Hill. Secretary of Commerce Gary Locke allegedly considered tendering his resignation after Obama forgot his name on the âObamaâs Cabinetâ Sporcle game. His family life is also feeling the effects: Obama’s daughter SashaÂ almost went to the press after 4 nights sans Harry Potter readings.
After his momentous completion of the 116,365th game, Obama started writing his own quizzes.
His quizzes can now be found on the Sporcle website, including âObama Merchandiseâ (the â’Yes We Can’ Openerâ and the â’Head’ Of State Obama Vibra-Dildoâ were the most frequently-missed answers) and âCelebrities Who Endorsed the Hip, Still-Relevant Obama in 2008.â
Incoming Speaker of the House, Representative John Boehner (R – OH), commented, âThis is a surprising admission. Weâve seen addictions before in Washingtonâsex, drugs, gambling–but Sporcle, thatâs certainly a change. Just not the one Americans were supposed to believe in.â