WASHINGTON – After seeing the Star Wars-like hologram of the late rapper Tupac Shakur at Coachella, Republicans were so enticed by the technology that they decided to purchase their own hologram projector. Republicans are using their new machine in the GOP National Office to project Ronald Regan 24/7.
Since last Monday, hologram Reagan has been repeating the phrases “Cut Taxes”, “Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!”, and “Trickle-down economics is good economics!”
When asked why the GOP made the purchase, former Republican Presidential candidate Newt Gingrich commented “Yea, we’re not crazy, we know that he’s dead, but… it can’t hurt to pretend, could it?”
Sarah Palin had to be removed from the room for repeated attempts to hug the hologram. Seeing her arms go through him, she would fall to her knees and weep, see the hologram with fresh eyes, and try again. “I know it’s not real, I just wanted to believe,” she explained.
In response, Democrats are already in the process of developing their FDR hologram to compete with the Reagan hologram. When completed, the hologram should be capable of reminding everyone about the New Deal and how it totally worked and how awesome it was. “It’s just nice to be reminded every now and then,” says President Obama.