Online Dictionary’s Pronunciation Guide Actually Quite Useless

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Toledo, OH — According to eye-witness reports from the reception desk, recent attempts by Neil Vandooren to settle a bet wagered on the pronunciation of the word “homage” resulted in a stalemate when the online dictionary consulted produced inconclusive results.

Vandooren, a human resource specialist at Stevenson Mechanical Incorporated, originally proposed the bet after the word in dispute was unexpectedly used in casual conversation during his lunch break. Witnesses told The Flipside that Vandooren looked up the word on freeonlinedictionary.com, which lacked an audio recording of the pronunciation of the word. Several of Vandooren’s colleagues attempted to interpret the pronunciation given in IPA to no avail, as no one was able to figure out how exactly that “freaky upside-down letter e” should be pronounced.

The bet, which divided the entire human resources department into several competing factions, was ultimately settled by a quick match of paper football.

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