NFL Referees Really Do Hate Your Team

Replacement Furor Football

NFL HEADQUARTERS, NEW YORK — Every football fan across the country can now bring out the smug grin normally reserved for the office the day after a close win. A recent investigation commissioned by the NFL has revealed that the referees do, in fact, hate your team.

This development has sparked outrage across the country from rednecks, dumb blonde girlfriends, and the middle class. Fans everywhere are reliving the pain of hundreds of past losses caused by the then alleged hatred.

“It all makes sense now,” lamented fan Josh Steele. “Ever since that bad call in that game back in ’94 I’ve known they hated us.”

A group of referees held a press conference to discuss the findings. When The Flipside asked which team the referees have such negative feelings for, referee Roger McKinley simply replied, “Yours.”

McKinley and the other referees who were present explained that they have always held a grudge against your team but no one quite remembers why. For that reason, they feel obligated to overlook “holding” calls, declare touchdowns invalid, and penalize your team for false starts at every opportunity.

“It’s really hard to explain,” McKinley elaborated. “All I can say to fans at home is that if you like a team, we hate your team more than we hate the team you’re playing against.”

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