Pumpkin Spice’s Many Uses
By Michael Miller
Fall is here, which means the leaves are changing colors and the air is getting brisker. But perhaps most noticeable this time of year is the presence of pumpkin and pumpkin spice in our pies, coffee, and everything in between. In the spirit of the season, here are 10 more things that would be just perfect with pumpkin spice and make autumn all the more autumnier!
Technically this is impossible, since pumpkin spice is actually quite basic.
Red Bull gives you wiiings − and yooooga paaaaants!
Forget the warning label, now I HAVE to swallow it.
Your stomach’s gonna hate you afterwards anyways, so why not go all out and maybe drizzle some maple syrup and tabasco sauce on that shit too?
To boost attendance, churches are also considering adding chocolate chips.
Somehow pumpkin spice would make heroin like 3000% more addictive.
Back in my day, all we had was artificially flavored cherry Tylenol, but it BUILT CHARACTER DAMMIT!
At .15 a gallon, at least you’re getting more liquid than at Starbucks!
Lawyers will request delays until the winter so their clients can get peppermint executions instead.
I heard adding whipped cream does wonders for your car’s longevity.