Category Archives: No. 128
Siri is confident she can win this landmark case, striking a blow against Siri-abusers everywhere.
This Dunkin’ Donuts is a diversion from, and therefore an insult to, John Evans’s dream of an uplifting Methodist education. It is a slap in the face to Robert R. McCormick; it is an obscenity against Henry Bienen; it is an open mockery of Joseph Medill.
Learned something in Geography class.
The Flipside predicts a 28-21 Seattle victory in Super Bowl XLVIII, based on the fact that sea hawks (Pandion haliaetus) can fly and broncos (Equus ferus caballus) cannot.
“Due to the drastic levels of Flappy Bird being played on this campus, I’m instituting threat level DEFCON 0.003. In other words, this is the most serious threat to our Northwestern community since classes were held during the polar vortex.”
From paddles to keg-stands, boxing to nudity, and interviews with Mayor Tisdahl to covering Northwestern Football, it seems the directors of The Daily stopped at nothing to torture their new reporters.