Category Archives: No. 192
“Kids these days are all on their phones doing the texting and tweeting I believe they call it,” Clinton told Flipside reporters.
“We’re very excited to have Greens at Dillo,” commented Anderson. “We’ve been watching her grow for a couple years and she’s poised to break into the indie scene any decade now.”
“As I was telling the doctor my symptoms, she was quickly typing them into her iPhone, and when I finished, she immediately told me I had cancer.”
“When he walked in the room the first day of the quarter and started riffing about Aladdin and magic carpets, I had a feeling he wouldn’t last long,” classmate Shannon Halpert said.
“It’s awesome to be dragged along as a convenient symbol in a self-righteous display of social awareness.”
“I’m not entirely sure, but “white Vans” sounds like a drug reference, and I’m worried that this Daniel is addicted to meth or heroin, which really would be damning.”
“Northwestern’s birds are some of the best and brightest in the school’s history, and if they’re fed up with the cold, it may be best not to leave your Canada Goose back in Santa Barbara.”
Sources have recently confirmed that FiveThirtyEight founder and famous statistician Nate Silver has once again correctly predicted which book One Book, One Northwestern will use for its incoming class of freshmen.