Category Archives: Latest News
According to witnesses, Johnny opened up his laptop’s documents folder to find the resume he had used to apply to work at as a grocery store stock boy five years prior.
“How did he get such a good idea? If I ever get a girlfriend, I know what movie I’ll watch.”
“Thinking of cleaning out the old fridge,” Orozco said in a 3:21 a.m. tweet. “Want to wait until the time is right, though.”
Many sources have speculated that this development will surely be good for Northwestern morale.
“When I married Donald, I thought I would be able to live the pampered life of an Eastern-European trophy wife.”
Tandel Jr. drives the first Smart Car to be rigged up with an 850 horsepower engine.
“I’ll try to cut down the foreplay to the first two seconds so we can get right into the action.”
“After the time came for the short answer section, the tapping went from ‘Amateur Drum Solo’ to ‘Pissed-Off Flock of Woodpeckers.’”
Under the regulation, every American will be required to use a browser extension that translates potentially subversive texts to politically acceptable language, to take effect February 25.