Opinion: New Facebook Has Ruined My Life

Well isn’t this just great? My life was finally starting to get on track. I was just beginning to like my job and I was actually making money in the stock market, if you can believe that. Then, all of a sudden, I come home, start up my Mac Book Pro, and boom, Facebook completely flips a shit! Does my life suck or what?

Facebook doesn’t care “what’s on my mind.” If they really cared, they’d change back to the old Facebook. Damn them. You know, why is everything that I post now considered “sharing?” Is this preschool or something? Facebook is for the big kids, not those little twerps who watch High School Musical all day (which is totally what I want to be doing but I can’t because I have to work).

Facebook actually has a vote out there. Can you believe that, a vote? Currently, 95% of people are against the new Facebook. 95%! Yet they haven’t switched back! The only explanation can be that they don’t intend to do anything. The existence of the poll is to give people peace of mind. Well let me tell you something, I have no peace in my mind, only hatred.

And don’t even get me started on whatever that shit is on the right side of the homepage. I mean really, what is that? Are they pictures which sometimes show up in the normal feed or are they groups and events? I don’t know. All I know is, New Facebook has ruined my life!

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