This Is the End: But Really, It Isn’t

Seth Rogen’s latest movie, an apocalyptic comedy entitled This Is the End, really isn’t the end of his signature pot-fueled humor.

Rogen, along with costars James Franco, Jay Baruchel, Jonah Hill, Danny McBride, and Craig Robinson, try to push their interpretation of the rapture as far as it can go before audiences find it too immature or too grotesque. Ironically playing their own depraved selves, the ensemble cast managed to incorporate not only projectile vomit and Michael Cera as a butt-slapping coke head, but also a demonic rape à la Rosemary’s Baby

Apparently, it couldn’t go far enough.

“I thought it was pretty tame,” said avid moviegoer Terrence Miller. “I could have done without the subtle social commentary on the Hollywood’s superficial egocentrism or the biblical references to the Book of Revelations. If they could have just left that out and incorporated about four more dick jokes, the movie would have been ten times better.”

Despite intense content warnings, most reviews agreed that the movie didn’t earn its R Rating. Spiking someone’s drink with ecstasy is “eighth grade stuff” and Channing Tatum’s cameo as Danny McBride’s sex slave is “comparable to his role of soccer-playing high school hunk in She’s the Man.”

Noted film critic Peter Travers wished that there had been more “rapey vibes,” adding “no one should pay $10 to see Hermione not take her panties off.”

Hoping to shock audiences into nervous chuckles, Rogen and co-writer Evan Goldberg received cutesy laughs over scenes like kicking around a decapitated head like a soccer ball and escalating threats to ejaculate on peoples’ faces.

The fact that the movie was too soft core for the American public is indicative of larger problem if the apocalypse ever does come.

“If James Franco isn’t going to heaven,” said Miller, “then I’m definitely screwed. Want to go smoke?”

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